v34.7: Blue Sky

Afternoon folks,

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The sky is blue and so is my mood today.  We just got back from the park with the kids and that was the highlight of the last 24 hours.

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Times are hard.  What makes things worse is family drama.  Those of you whom I game with may find this hard to believe, but I hate drama; it tires me out and can be quite stressful.  Sometimes gaming drama can be interesting, but when there is real-life drama going on it, in addition to everything else, it can really wear a person out FAST.  We've been going through a bout of family drama lately.  Not directly related to my family, but with my sister and her family.  I'm not going to give any details other than I'm tired of it.  I'm tired of seeing my sister get frustrated and angry over this and I'm tired of the bull shit she has had to endure.  It isn't fair and it has to stop.

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You see folks, life is hard and sometimes people do things they aren't too terribly proud of.  I've been there as I'm sure most of you have.  Sometimes we screw up bad and it takes a long time to recover from it.  In the case with my sister, I don't see any "nice" solution to the problem and I fear it will get worse before it gets better.  I often sit here and wonder what the hell happened.  I am an outsider looking in and I only see what I see.  I've talked to both sides and found myself torn between family and friendship.  How can someone be a friend to someone else when they have hurt a family member?  On the flip side, how can one throw away over 10 years of friendship?  This is the issue I'm faced with (in addition to the plethora of other things I'm dealing with) and this "drama" is starting to really wear me out.  I can only imagine how my sister feels, I'm sure "worn out" doesn't even begin to describe it.

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We push on and take it one day at a time; or in this case, one hour at a time.  It is one of those things you wish you could just wake up from and have it all be a bad dream.  Unfortunately, the dream is life and we won't "wake up" from it until we die.  So what is one to do?  Like most things in life, you just have to deal with it.  It's hard and it doesn't seem fair but there is good in all this.  For starters, happiness is back.  My sister hasn't seemed this happy in quite awhile.  My old sister is back and she has a smile on her face, not the facade of a smile that I've seen these past few years.  My niece seems happier too despite being dragged through the mud along with all the other drama; something a child should NEVER have to deal with.  That almost makes me angry when I think about it.  Children are very trusting and naive.  They are very impressionable, especially when guidance comes from a parent or close relative.  Children deal with things a lot different than adults.  While adults put on a good face and hurt on the inside, children wear their emotions on their sleeves and you can usually tell when they're hurting.  Children should never need to worry about the things parents worry about and should be sheltered and protected from drama like this; not brought into the middle of it.

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Anyway folks, as I said my mood is blue and I'm not much in the mood to write today.  Hopefully things turn around tomorrow.

Cheers,

Al